Family Values
This Means War
By Ishtar
Reviews
razz posted a comment on Tuesday 5th December 2006 3:26pm for This Means War
You've made a really great start here, but the later chapters have been a little ... well ... shit.
I really do love your ideas, and you are a good writer - it's just the plot is beginning to lag. A lot.
I didn't really like that you made all three children a wizard/witch. That's kind of unrealistic, and unnecessary - you could have easily left Pugsley, keeping him a tie back to the family. Making them attend Hogwarts was a bit of a let down too - it's been done, what, a bazillion squillion times already? You had so many options, you could have made it so much more. Hogwarts is boring. Hogwarts is for stupid fangirls without the brains to create their own plot. And, seriously, if you start to follow PS - Just. Don't.
The marriage contract was entirely cliche, but you pulled it off pretty well. Uncle Remus is gay. Period. That really just shitted me, and spoiled a whole lot of the Addams' wacky charm. They should have killed the motherfucker and eaten him for lunch.
Harry is not nearly - not even slightly, marginally close - to how strange he could have been, having grown up an Addams. Again, you're not using the potential this story has. You've made Harry dull. He's just a mirrored canon!Harry, having been given different opportunities (ie he knows a bit of magic). I think you should have gone all out here - Harry should have been an outlandish scandal, a horror to the eyes of normality. You could have made him the coolest, craziest Harry Potter out there.
The part where Harry gets himself doused in boils was ridiculously wimpy. Oh, poor little Harry. Let me just puke. And what's up with the all powerful Wednesday crap? Agh. Please, please tread carefully - your Wednesday is quickly becoming another picture perfect Mary Sue.
Bah. Don't be offended by any of this, please. I'm only being honest. I've read this far, and I have enjoyed it.
Good luck!
Ishtar replied:
Razz, if you wish your comments to be taken seriously, you might want to consider presenting them somewhat less offensively. "Honesty" is one thing. Insults and obscenities are another. Try expressing yourself less crudely; you'll get farther.
Hogwarts was necessary to make it a Harry Potter story, which this is primarily. Sending them anywhere else would have made it an Addams Family story with unnecessary Harry Potter insert. Hopefully you will appreciate where the plot goes; it's starting off with a little bit of PS but will take a sharp left at Albuquerque - I mean Halloween.
If you want a really perverse, dark Addams Harry, wait for Jeconais' version, Perfect Slytherins. Hopefully you will like that one better.
Wednesday is far from all powerful. Harry (you know, the kid who lifted a cast iron stove to keep it from falling on her - when most kids have problems with a feather) is far more powerful than she is. She's just the one that got the first aid training, since she was deemed by her family to be the one least likely to be injured and needing it.
I can't make this story all things to everyone; as it is, I'm juggling three different sources for the Addams Family material, and I'm trying to err on the side of humor rather than all out psychopathy.
la13 posted a comment on Tuesday 5th December 2006 4:00am for This Means War
aww, so much that i loved in this chapter! first, can't wait to see how snape deals with having harry in his house. it's certainly not a good beginnning.... And i also loved the showdown between the sorting hat and Dumbledore/Snape--sounds like a very odd western. either way, when someone's old hat is beating you at an argument, you know have problems. the scene with filch made me laugh so hard--the detention certainly weren't what he was expecting. most of all, i'm in suspense to see what'll happen with harry and the rest of Slytherin. hopefully he'll make a few more friends eventually...anyway, another fabulous chapter. i enjoy it lots!
DreamRed posted a comment on Sunday 3rd December 2006 7:41am for This Means War
Hahaha, brilliant. Looking forwards to the next chapter very much.
RedPat posted a comment on Saturday 2nd December 2006 4:24pm for This Means War
After reading some other reviews, I'm reminded of the contract Dumbledore signed, and the part where the Family is to notified of any visits to the hospital wing. And granting permission for Family visits while the child(ren)is/are in the hospital wing.
Barely a week, and the Family will be descending upon the castle. Wow.
fountaam posted a comment on Saturday 2nd December 2006 10:47am for This Means War
:) Poor Harry though
Kid Dynomite posted a comment on Friday 1st December 2006 9:31pm for This Means War
I'd just like to say that I think this is an excellent story, and a very good blending of the two universes. I'm especially eager to see how Luna Lovegood is brought into the story. Between the Addams family excentricies and Luna's own interesting disposition, it should be so very interesting.
So, you keep writing, and I'll keep reading. Take care, and good job.
Josh
Tim Anklesaria posted a comment on Friday 1st December 2006 6:52pm for This Means War
Beautiful
This crossover is a lot of fun to read. You have managed to mix the two worlds beautifully.
The Addamses are as strange as every but you have managed not to make them overly magical. I love the way they confound Dumbeldore with their knowledge of the Muggle world.
I cant wait to see what happens next. Please continue this story and update soon.
RebeccaJC posted a comment on Friday 1st December 2006 11:46am for This Means War
Love the story. I always look forward to reading another chapter. It has me humming the theme song at odd times. I hope you finish it.
Patches posted a comment on Friday 1st December 2006 4:00am for This Means War
Excellent chapter! Snape is certainly majorly clueless in this one! He hasn't seen anything until he sees what the 3 of them can come up with. Thanks so much for writing. I look forward to the next chapter! pms
Skullera posted a comment on Friday 1st December 2006 2:37am for This Means War
Love it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I hope to see another chapter up soon! I mean, Harry potter and the addams family??? How come no one else had ever thought of that before!!!!
And you merged both so well! Its amazing!!! More, please!
happyreader posted a comment on Friday 1st December 2006 1:36am for This Means War
Had a lot of fun with this x-over, more than most.
Maybe cuz I am old enough to remember the Addams family ( snap snap ) ? Hope you continue to enjoy writing it as well. ( no benefit to me ,,, hehehe)
Ivan Cantaros posted a comment on Thursday 30th November 2006 3:46pm for This Means War
briliant! i hope the dark trio exact a deadly retribution for malfoy and his cronies.. anyway nice job.. i always wait for these updates.. its good that you update fast.. i'l wait for the updates.. ja!
Animalluver1985 posted a comment on Thursday 30th November 2006 3:40pm for This Means War
I really love this story. This story idea's got such promise and you're doing a really great job of bringing it out. I can't wait to read more.
Faith1 posted a comment on Thursday 30th November 2006 12:23pm for This Means War
Oooh, well this sounds positively.... promising...
MrRobertsIII posted a comment on Thursday 30th November 2006 10:39am for This Means War
Excellent job with Pugsley and Wednesday. Looking forward to Malfoy suffering, often and incurably. Perhaps Pugsley would be the right kind of friend for Neville. Great fic.
Sonicdale posted a comment on Thursday 30th November 2006 10:32am for This Means War
oooooooooooooooooooooooo.
I likey.
I likey alot.
THis is getting better. And the Adams vs. Malfoy feud is going to be one for the history books.
Heh.
Ok. Good work. Now, Imperio! Stop eating, sleeping, working and goofing off and write the next chapter. Good. Now that you've been properly instructed, go forth and multiply.
jeffstrauser@yahoo.com posted a comment on Thursday 30th November 2006 10:04am for This Means War
Bloody Brilliant!!!! They're right though it does mean war. I can't wait to see what happens next. When they mean war are they talking like a prank war? If so wouldn't getting the Weasley twins involved be one of the best things to do if they're gonna be pranking? DO keep up the outstanding work and update soon please:):):):)
Prince Charon posted a comment on Thursday 30th November 2006 7:35am for This Means War
Malfoy is about to discover whole new levels of pain and humiliation, I think.
C^rrot 6 posted a comment on Thursday 30th November 2006 4:55am for This Means War
Well, first off: Another excellent chapter. And I want to applaud you for not going the (all too)usual route and having Snape suddenly see the light and be singing Harry's praises merely because the lad was Sorted into his House. Snape has proven time and time again in canon that he is going to hold onto this hatred and grudge of his come hell, high water and any evidence that proves him to be wrong (as he surely must have seen by Fifth year as well as rooting about within Harry's memories) Personally I'm of the opinion that his hatred/enimty has merely gained a life of it's own and rational reasons behind it simplely don't exist. Much like enjoying a certain color over others or a certain taste. You merely do, explaining why or trying to change such is near impossible.
Your insinuation about Slythering being the House not living up to it's Founders standards is not only great, but fitting. Like the Hat said, hopefully things might turn around with a little Addams help. Speaking of which I'm also happy to see that Slythering didn't just simply roll over, die and snap to Wednesday, Harry and Pugsley's every whim. Hard held beliefs simply don't change overnight, and some never at all.
I can also see why the children aren't immediately running off to the Family. While supporting Family is important I get the feeling that being able to stand on your own two feet was one of the lessons imparted during childhood. Gomez and Morticia might have plans of their own but I don't see the children asking for their help till they feel matters are beyond their ability to handle. That being said I look forward to the Trio showing what real cunning and wit are; as any payback they take will have to be both subtle and sly; what with Snape looking for any excuse to descend upon them.
One question; not that I do not love this story dearly, but you aren't planning to write out all seven years are you? Not that I wouldn't eagerly read such, but I can't recall the last time I saw an author pull that off without loosing interest or inspiriation long before finishing. Let alone of this quality of writing.
Ishtar replied:
One question; not that I do not love this story dearly, but you aren't planning to write out all seven years are you? Not that I wouldn't eagerly read such, but I can't recall the last time I saw an author pull that off without loosing interest or inspiriation long before finishing. Let alone of this quality of writing.
I'm going to be covering at least through the Tri-Wizard Tournament. However, because certain plot elements are going to be going in very different directions, it won't be just a rewrite of canon - it's going completly cattywampus. Canon things which are the same will just be mentioned so you know they're there. Like the whole flying lesson thing - Harry's not getting on the Quidditch team in first year, not with Snape being the way he is, so that will be glossed over in about a paragraph. Its only importance will be showing Harry making connections with other houses. My original plan was for the story to go about 25 chapters. I'm still shooting for that ... 30 at most.
DarthLoki posted a comment on Thursday 7th December 2006 12:26pm for This Means War